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Tag: HVZ

  • The Date is the Title

    Stiff from first ever HVZ Goat Yard shift. Alone—no second attendant— for most of the shift. Started just liking having no people stopping by. Meditating. Just sit: clouds, goats, red barn roof top weathervanes. The restaurant closes at 4pm. No chance to eat after shift, will need to come early. I miss my goat herd. These goats, their names, the mix of horn or not are not my goats.

    Looking forward to posting content to blog. But both sites are unreachable. Tech support was not able to determine the issue and will have to wait until Monday for different staff to look into the issue. Starting to wonder if the problem is as simple as needing to update the debit card expiration date.

    Still stuck on websites not working. Email has not been shut off, still arriving, payment issues not effecting that aspect.

    Keep thinking about smug Tim and his Full Circle email. Totally took the desire out of wanting to send him another daily. I told Claude that I would not send anything all weekend. Silly to send a daily on days that Tim is not around. He won’t be back in the office until Tuesday. The first step is to see if I can refrain from sending anything Sat-Sun-Mon. So far. I’m not panicking. The reason: the smug Tim stuck in my head. Stuck in the emotion buffer of my heart.

    Letting Max pull stuff off my shelf. Forcing self to sit very still and not care, not care, not care. The stuff will be on the floor, right? Can’t really go anyway, right? Can the objects or papers get destroyed or lost? Will I have less stress to not care, to let it happen? No amount of thinking the action through can fully reveal all the consequences of letting this happen. Sometimes not caring can reveal the real truth of how something really is. You can think all through the what will happen, but can’t force everything, sometimes just need to watch it play out in real time.

  • HVZ – The Goat Yard

    During therapy with Jon, he suggested that I seek out a volunteer/service activity. After thinking through some options, I applied at the Literacy Agency. My first helpee didn’t need remedial reading help. We only met a couple of times before she stopped participating. I lost interest and didn’t request a new paring.

    Why am I pursing the HVZ Goat Yard? Primarily because the activity of volunteering seems high on many peoples’ list of how to emerge from isolation and to do something that contributes. I’m basically being proactive before more people nag me with suggestions on how I should add volunteering. And if I get in front of the idea to pick something I might be truly interested in.

    If selected, I will be pared with a shift partner. I will establish a consistent weekly shift. I will be required to be nice to people, answer questions about goats, and pass out treats. I think I remember that there is sweeping involved. Volunteers don’t have the husbandry level of knowledge and experience to actually be involved in feeding and tending the goats inside their yard. That is disappointing.

    Assuming I get picked to volunteer, I don’t foresee a three-hour shift once a week to be a problem. I have lots of time off. I just need to pick the most advantageous shift time to last me throughout the summer till Labor Day. There is a system for swapping shifts as needed.

    The prerequisite for getting excited about HVZ volunteering: transportation. I’m highly considering the purchase of a new bike.