Dinner with JC went out — fish fry — at a noisy bar. An item that was troublesome, Claude says I should tell you about. I mentioned to JC that in the elevator going to the lab on Park Street, a man around my age said something to me. Elevator talk like. The key thing for discussion: I wouldn’t even look him in the eye, because I didn’t want to get hopefully that a random, older guy took the time to be nice and speak to me. My feeling in the moment, without looking at him, just his tone of voice and the atmosphere… it seemed just a bit more than elevator nothingness. I hated myself for even giving any thought to wondering; wrong to not be nicer/polite. Instead I was cold and depressed. Anyway, I was trying to explain to Janet about my fear of how do I not keep doing the Limerence thing… and she cut me off and told me it was on elevator talk and to drop it. She told me that her whole experience is that she can’t look any man in the eye because as a cute asian female she is constantly, unwantedly getting hit on, and she doesn’t want/like it. Later, when I tried some other subject, I asked if she knew how old the two cute men were across the way. She seems huffy, saying she didn’t have her glasses on. So take away. Janet not the right person to bounce off thoughts about men. Learned JC struggles with different issue with men.